Goldilocks measures and compares adult toys. Everything here is written in plain words, and none of it is for under-18s.
We remember your answer for this visit only — nothing is stored beyond the session, and no account is needed.
5 sizes, 5.0–8.0″ around, each drawn to scale from the maker's published figures.
Wider than the page here — scroll the chart sideways for the rest of the range. It's drawn at one fixed scale so every size stays directly comparable.
Shape traced from the maker's own cut-out, drawn from the maker's numbers — 5.0″ around at the widest point of the shaft.Sized to your screen by the card you matched.
Hold any bank card upright against the screen and drag until the outline matches it — every card is 85.6 × 54 mm.
Owners put the comfortable increment at half an inch of circumference per step up, an inch at the very most. Anything wider is where the “I sized up and regretted it” posts come from — girth is the constraint, not length.
| Maker says maker-published | Owners measured community-measured | |
|---|---|---|
| Total length | 9.0″ | no owner measurements yet |
| Widest girth | 5.0″ | no owner measurements yet |
Left column is the maker's own published figure, re-read daily. Right column is owners' calipers — n is how many, and ✓ lands at three independent measurements agreeing within 2mm. Nobody has measured any of these yet — measured yours? here's how →
The Small Happy Puppy Tail has 5.0″ around at its widest, as SquarePeg publish it.
The Medium Happy Puppy Tail has 5.9″ around at its widest, as SquarePeg publish it.
The Large Happy Puppy Tail has 6.5″ around at its widest, as SquarePeg publish it.
The Extra Large Happy Puppy Tail has 8.0″ around at its widest, as SquarePeg publish it.
SquarePeg say silicone lube is fine. They name water-based, grease/oil-based, silicone-based, J-Lube-based and powdered-based lube as safe. In their words: SquarePeg is the maker that argues the case publicly. "I have seen no melting or dissolving effects of using silicone lubes on my toys in all these years… many of my customers use silicone lube exclusively and there have been no reported adverse affects since I introduced SuperSoft silicone to the adult toy market in 2006." It publishes a dedicated article, 'Origins of myth that silicone lube is bad for silicone toys', arguing the damage people blamed on silicone lube was actually vinyl plasticiser contact, and that cured silicone absorbing and re-releasing silicone fluid made the false association stick. It does flag a practical cost: silicone lube is hard to wash off and can trap odours and bacteria "like a protective blanket" — Blue Dawn® or acetone will remove it. Makers genuinely disagree on this one, so a rule you've read on another maker's page may not hold here.
Sources — Lube — SquarePegToys® Health & Safety GuideOrigins of myth that silicone lube is bad for silicone toys — SquarePegToys® Q&A
Straight from SquarePeg: Soap and water first — the soap you need depends on the lube you used. Then boil, dishwash, bake or bleach-soak; the silicone tolerates up to 400°F. Wash with plain soap and water to remove lube and residue, then dry with a soft cloth. J-Lube rinses with mild detergent; grease lubes need a grease-cutting soap; silicone lube is "the most persistent" and needs something as strong as Dawn®. Soaking is fine (silicone is hydrophobic) — but never soak silicone alongside vinyl toys. Dishwasher-safe on either rack, but the abrasive action can dull and pit the surface over time.
Sources — How do I clean and sterilize SquarePegToys®? — Q&AStoring Your Toys — SquarePegToys® Q&A
SquarePeg offer SquarePegHole™ on some models: A universal socket in the base that grips peg-type mounts with the industry-standard 3/4″ base shaft. Introduced November 2017. SquarePeg offer FlushCup™ on some models: A low-profile suction base cast into the toy itself, so the toy sits flush to the surface instead of wobbling on a stem. Introduced October 2017. Check the O-ring you already own before you buy.
Sources — SquarePegHole™ — SquarePegToys® custom basesFlushCup™ — SquarePegToys® custom basesHarness Base — SquarePegToys® custom bases
Standing catalogue, not drops. Custom base requests are taken by email on models that don't list the option. Their own stated windows — order processing: orders received Mon–Fri by 8 AM Pacific / 11 AM Eastern process to ship the same day; 99.7% of orders ship the same or next business day. Those windows are the maker's own published figures.
Sources — Shipping — SquarePegToys®Innovation — SquarePegToys®Shipping — SquarePegToys®
Not yet. Every number here is a figure published by SquarePeg. When three or more owners measure the same point and agree within 2mm, we mark it verified and show the count — nothing on this sculpt has reached that bar.
Structured reviews, community measurements and spec corrections — the checks that catch a wrong number. Log in to add yours.
Reviews, measurements and corrections come from people who own the toy.
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